Camping Kayt Is Fun Kayt: How Getting Outside Helped Me Unclench

Safety Is My Love Language

When my husband and I were dating, we talked about the Five Love Languages like every overachieving couple trying to do it “right.” His was probably words of affirmation. Or physical touch. Mine?

Safety.

Not technically one of the official love languages, I know. But after years of white-knuckling my way through a high-stress marriage to someone navigating addiction, my nervous system had built a little shrine to control. I was the queen of over-performing, over-scheduling, and over-correcting. Micromanaging everything from how the dishwasher got loaded to how a tent got staked.

I’m in a different place now. Second marriage, six years strong. A kind, funny, steady, loving husband who teaches special ed and runs his own handyman business, all while supporting my business and my weird brain. We both volunteer. We both have our own hobbies. We both juggle way too much.

And last weekend, we finally stopped.

We camped.

The Creek, the Rain, and the Sleeping Bag That Didn’t Need Me

We camped at Moonshine Creek, a quiet little spot just outside Pisgah National Forest in North Carolina. The place was magical for us — not because of any one big thing, but because of all the little ones.

Our tent site was tucked next to the creek, with flowers blooming and water babbling loud enough to drown out any camper noise. I swear that creek was tuned to the exact frequency of “soothing.”

It started raining as we set up camp. Which, normally? Stress-inducing. But something about poncho-wrangling a tent with a man who laughs easily made it not just bearable, but borderline fun. It felt like building a tiny fortress — not just from the rain, but from the entire to-do list of our lives.

By the time we were packing up to leave, I had a moment. A real, lightbulb-in-the-woods type of moment.

I looked over and realized Liam was rolling up the double-wide sleeping bag… his way. Not the “best” way. Not the “tightest roll gets the medal” way. And I didn’t say a thing.

I even joked about it, “I slept in, I’m lounging about, I’m eating camp leftovers for breakfast, and I’m not micromanaging your packing strategy. Camping Kayt is fun Kayt!” He looked up and smiled: “Camping Kayt is fun.”

Reader, he noticed.

The Science Says Nature Works (Even If You’re Type A)

I’m not the only one who feels better outside — science agrees, big time. (Come on, you didn’t think I’d skip the research, did you? You can take Kayt into the wild, but you can’t take the wild curiosity out of Kayt.)

• A 2020 study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that just two hours a week in nature significantly improves mental well-being. (Imagine what two hours a day could do!)

• The American Psychological Association reports that spending time in green spaces reduces cortisol, the stress hormone, and may lower blood pressure and anxiety symptoms.

• And a 2022 meta-review in BMC Psychiatry confirmed that nature-based interventions — like hiking, forest bathing, or yes, camping — can help reduce symptoms of depression, anxiety, and burnout.

It doesn’t magically fix everything (therapy and meds are still part of my wellness toolkit), but nature adds something none of those can: a place where nothing demands perfection.

The tent doesn’t care if you packed the “right” sleeping pad. The trees don’t judge your breakfast choices. You can be exactly who you are — sweaty, sleepy, silly — and that’s enough.

Field Tip: Trade Control for Curiosity

Micromanaging is often a trauma response, not a personality trait. If you’re used to keeping your world spinning so it doesn’t fall apart, letting go can feel like danger, not peace.

Camping, being outdoors, helped me retrain that instinct — slowly.

Now, when I feel myself starting to grip too tight, clench my jaw, tell my husband the tall cups actually need to be placed on the right-hand side of the dishwasher,  I ask:

Would Camping Kayt worry about this?

Usually, the answer is no.

Why I Keep Coming Back to the Woods

It’s not that Pisgah National Forest is “better” than the beach. It’s just that being outdoors more often — wherever I can get it — helps me remember who I am when I’m not over-functioning.

Camping strips away the noise. Literally and figuratively. It reminds me that safety isn’t just a love language I invented out of necessity — it’s a real, felt thing I can create with the right man, in the right moment, in the right patch of forest.

And sometimes that patch comes with leftover s’mores for breakfast. Yum!

5 Ways Camping Calms an Overthinking Brain

1. Nature Physically Lowers Stress Hormones

You’re not imagining it — your body actually chills out in the woods. A 2019 study in Frontiers in Psychology found that just 20 minutes in nature can significantly lower cortisol levels. Add a full weekend of fresh air, trees, and no inbox? Your nervous system gets to take off its metaphorical bra and breathe.

Bonus points if there’s a creek nearby. Nature’s white noise machine > Spotify.

2. There’s No “Perfect” Way to Toast a Marshmallow

Camping rewires your perfectionism. Out there, good enough is great. The tent goes up — maybe lopsided. The coffee tastes like trees. Your hair is its own ecosystem. You’ve ditched the literal bra. And somehow, all of it is exactly right.

That freedom from control? It’s medicine for the micro-managers and spreadsheet schedulers among us.

3. It Forces a True Exit From the To-Do List

You can’t vacuum a rug that isn’t there. You can’t check email with zero bars. Camping pulls you out of your chore-filled home environment and into a space where the only thing that needs managing is whether the firewood is dry.

Getting a few hours from home helps create mental and physical separation from stressors — a proven strategy in trauma recovery and burnout prevention.

4. You Create Something Together

Even a basic car camping trip is a team project. You’re building a temporary home, cooking dinner from scratch, solving tiny logistics together.

Research from the Gottman Institute shows that shared experiences — especially in nature — strengthen emotional bonds and build what they call “positive sentiment override.” Translation: you’re more likely to see each other through kind eyes, not just task-master lenses.

(And if one of you burns the veggie burgers, you’ll probably laugh about it later.)

5. You Remember Who You Are Without the Noise

Camping offers a reset button — not just for your brain, but your identity.

Out there, you’re not “the one who keeps it all together.” You’re just a person. A human being.

A human. Being.

Listening to the creek, feeling the breeze, smelling the campfire, tasting the marshmallows, watching the stars, and remembering what calm feels like—in your bones.

And if you can take a little of that back home with you? That’s just magic.